Wife Swap
So, I don’t normally watch this sort of crap. The show is always set to put two families together with diametrically opposed views of the world to maximize conflict and boost ratings. However, after perusing io9 and reading about this particular episode, I just had to watch it.
The survivalist family are absolutely ridiculous and hilarious. They went out and bought a whole lot of shit under the “no payments until 2012” because, according to them, no one is going to be around in 2012 to come collect the money.
The other family has a daughter who’s a golf prodigy of some type. So the wife works six jobs, yes I said six, while the husband is the daughter’s manager. Unfortunately, they ignore their son who is more of an academic.
Both families are nuts, but it’s sure to get some ratings. Crazy always sells.
The survival woman goes to her new home and all she sees is how the other family is going to be screwed when 2012 comes. Everything she saw, she questioned how it would be useful when the zombies come. Yeah, I laughed too. She believes there are going to be zombies everywhere in 2012 and the “new” daughter’s golf clubs might be useful for clubbing zombies.
Also, the survivalist mother reads about her new family. This family spends over $40,000 a year on their daughter’s golfing. Fucking nuts! The other woman wonders what the survivalist family is going to do in 2013 when the bill collectors come and they have no money.
One note, if you’re a survivalist, shouldn’t you be in shape and not fat? Yeah, the golfing family thinks that she’s a nutbag as well.
The golfing dad tried to take the survivalist mom’s survival bag away from her and she freaked out. The golfing mom thinks the survivalist family is nuts. She believes it’s science fiction and not reality.
So, the mom’s settle in and think each other’s lives are crazy. The survivalist mom is pissed that she has to work six jobs and do all the housework. The golf dad believes that women have a place in the home and that’s to do all the chores.
The survivalist mom tries to explain her beliefs to the golf dad and he busts a gut laughing at her. Every time she tries to explain stuff to the golf family, they laugh at her. The golf mom thinks the other family is anti-social and dangerous. The survivalist dad freaks out when a golf pro comes over to the house because some stranger comes to the house without his knowledge. He fears that the guy might steal stuff or hurt his family. Yeah, he’s looney tunes.
Instead of freaking out, the golfing family finds all the survivalist training and gear to be funny. They seem to roll with the punches, probably because they know that, in two weeks, the crazy lady will be gone and mom will be back home.
The survivalist dad says that the kids can’t have a party at the house because the dad isn’t uncomfortable with people in his house. He doesn’t think the people will attack him, but he thinks the kids will get into stuff that they shouldn’t be in to. Meanwhile, survivalist mom drills the golf family on rafting and getting a life jacket on their dog.
Notably, when the survivalist mom gets mad at the golfer dad, she storms out of the house and goes for a walk without her precious survival bag. Golfer mom and survivalist dad get into a fight and he throws golfer mom out of the house. I laughed at all this. It’s just so damned ridiculous. However, the survivalist dad did apologize a little bit later when he calmed down a bit. The dude seriously needs to stop freaking out over people touching his survival gear and “strange” people being in his house.
The survivalist dad agrees to let a Mayan expert in the house, but he still isn’t convinced. He thinks the books and movies about the topic are more authoritative. Unfortunately, he’s already got his mind made up that it’s going to happen.
Turns out the survivalist kids really want to do other stuff other than think about the end of the world and survivalist dad lets the kids have a party. Survivalist dad ends up having fun and wants to have more parties. Apparently, he didn’t want people in his house because he didn’t want them to learn his secrets and his skills.
Both families are dysfunctional, but the survivalist family is just batshit insane. It wouldn’t take much to help the golf family, but the survivalist family will probably continue to be nuts until 1 January 2013.
In the end, golfer dad started going to some of his son’s basketball games. The survivalist parents are actually letting their kids have friends over. They also let the Mayan professor come back again and the dad said he shouldn’t believe everything that is out there.
This show is, overall, pretty sad. I just can’t help laughing at folks that are stocking up on survival gear and hunkering down waiting for the world to end. The golfing family should send some of their $40,000 a year on golf shit to me. I’d put the money to great use.
