It has been awhile since I posted here and I should be telling you all the great news about how I have got a job and that we are moving to Nebraska. Instead I am feeling so sad because I just found out my friend Matthew died on April 10th.

Matthew was a person whom I met back when we were both at the University of Salford in early 1993. We met through another friend and become quite close. After university, we went our separate ways. He went to Nottingham to study for a Master’s degree in computer science and I went to America. We did lose contact for a short while but by 1997 we were in regular contact again. Thats when I found out that Matt had been diagnosed with Cronic Fatigue Syndrome (CFS or ME). From then on, Matt struggled with his health and, in 2004, even had treatment for a tumor in his eye.

Despite all this, I always thought he would get better and that his life was never at any risk. In the last year or so, my contact had become less and less because he was too tired to even write a letter or talk on the phone. I sent him a Christmas card and a note in December. Then, when his mother wrote to me telling me he was in a care center, I wrote to him again letting him know how things were going with me. I was recently thinking about him and planning on another letter when I found out he had died :(

I think of all the fun times we had when we were in college. He was one of the people that made my life at Salford bearable. I also think of the kind of life that he could have had if he had not become ill. I know that Matt wanted all the things out of life that most people want, to settle down with a nice woman, have a family and a home….and he never got to have any of that.

Today, when I was at school I could not help but feel how superfical and unimportant life is here. The people here know nothing of my past life and the people and events I have experienced. All day I thought about Mathhew and my time at Salford. It seems like a world away now and certainly far away from here. I deciced not to tell anyone at school about what had happened. They never seem sincere and any sympathy they would give would not be welcome. Instead, I thought about Matthew and how I will miss him. He was a good friend, one of my best friends and that makes the work at school seem trivial when I think of him.